The Love of my Life

The LOVE of my LIFE

and my BEST FRIEND!

We met after I had just graduated at Ricks College (now BYU Idaho) with my Associates degree. He knew of me through my Mom who had just started taking some college courses again. I knew nothing of him, other than my Mom telling me once a month or two earlier there was someone she wanted me to meet. I said, "Uh, no thanks!" I certainly wasn't interested in anyone my Mom might recommend to me. I think that is pretty much everyone's sentiment, when it comes to their parents recommending a date!!

He called and asked me out on a Tuesday night for a date on Saturday, shortly after I got home. Who does that? I was used to guys asking me out a day or two in advance, a week if it was a really special occasion. So I thought he was desperate which made me not want to go out with him. He asked me if I had something going on, and for the life of me I couldn't remember what my plans were. I hemmed and hawed and after thinking of nothing I could tell him, I told him that yes I was available.




But, a few days later at the Institute of Religion, at Eastern Washington University, where he was attending college, they were having what they called Friday Forum. They have a special speaker and serve lunch. I found out he would be there. So I went to check him out. If he met my approval I would keep the Date, if not I would cancel.




My older sister, Kallie, was home staying with my Mom while her husband was out on a Westpak in the Navy. Kallie had just given birth to her first baby a few weeks before. I had told her about this guy who just happened to call and I confided in her my skeptism. She knew of my scheming to cancel the date if I was unimpressed. And I realized I had the perfect reason to decline, should I decide to do so.



I don't know how I could have forgotten that it was Kallie's Baby Shower on the same day of the Date with this stranger. I wished I had remembered that so I could have told him no. I did want to go to my Sister's shower. Afterall, I was burned out on guys after Frank, my college love, who broke up with me and was engaged to someone else a month later. And yeah, I was still dating but strictly for fun.

I was not attending the Single Adult ward in Spokane for a reason. There were some crazy guys there, and after having been there and done that and experiencing being stalked by Michael, a member of that ward, after I 'broke up' with him the summer before, I was not interested in any of them. Besides, I had come home from college for the summer with the intent to save money and put in my papers to serve a mission. I would be turning 21 the following November, that is the minimum age at which women in our Church are able to serve.

So there I was at the Institute, peering in the door of the large room everyone was gathered in eating lunch, and listening to a speaker. I had arrived after it started for good reason. It would be easier for me to sneak in and out unnoticed and besides no one there even knew who I was.

I wouldn't have to explain myself to anyone. Actually, I did know who a few of the people there were, ones that I recognized from the previous Summer in the Singles Ward. But they were mainly acquaintances after no contact for nearly a year and limited knowledge of each other when I did know them.

As I moved my eyes around the room trying to figure out who he was, I noticed how filled the room was and how difficult it might be to find him. Finally, seated at a table in the center of the room I saw a light colored, almost white haired guy I recognized as being the brother of a couple of sisters in the singles ward. Seated next to him was a guy with short dark layered hair. He was wearing a grey short-sleeved t-shirt and jeans. His back was positioned so that it was facing the doorway where I was peering in.

I did not have a good enough vantage point from the doorway. So I manuevered myself past the foosball table and seated myself at a table in the back. I pretended to listen to the speaker as I kept glancing over in his direction for a better look. He had light colored eyes and a well-defined jaw. He was clean cut and handsome. "Oh my," I thought to myself, "I just may have to stay and meet this guy when the program is over." In our phone conversation, a few days earlier, I had told him I may come to Friday Forum but wasn't sure. So I knew there was a possibility he may be looking for me also.

He had never seen me in person before either. Oh no! I had just realized he may be trying to check me out in the same subtle way that I had been trying to investigate him. I somehow felt a little more vulnerable and uncomfortable at the thought. Then I remembered how after being dumped by Frank, I was not living my life out of desperation and I would not give potential suitors the power that I once gave them. A guy would no longer determine my attitude and outlook on life. Besides, I mused, I'm going on a mission in about 6 or 8 months anyway.

The speaker ended, and to this day I cannot recall whether it was a man or a woman or what they spoke on. I decided it was make it or break it time. Afterall, I liked my first impression. Would my Sister understand if I decided to miss the Babyshower of her firstborn? All of a sudden I didn't care.

Physically abandoning my fears, but mentally acknowledging my frailties, I approched him. I asked him if he was who I had spoken with on the phone earlier in the week; I was pretty hopeful after what I'd observed. If it wasn't him, maybe I'd crawl under the table in embarassment. I could sneak out of the room and I'd never have to speak to him or see him again. To my delight, it was him! No embarassment needed.

I introduced myself and we conversed casually. His name was Laren, not Lauren or Loren but LARE'-UN. It brought me back to my first year at Ricks College when I knew a guy there named Laren, spelled the same way even. That surprised him and even impressed him as most people wanted to mispronounce his name or call him Larry, the wrong name altogether. We finalized the details of our plans for our date the next day at Riverfront Park in Spokane.



Maybe I will divulge the details of that date in another post, but I will say a couple of things about that date now. There I was with someone who I had hardly any previous knowledge of a week earlier and we were having good conversation and a good time together. That was a start, and it had to be more fun than a bunch of women gathered in someone's living room oogling over another outfit for a newborn baby. I think I wrote in my journal that night that I could see us becoming good friends.

At one point during the date we went to cross a somewhat long suspension bridge that spans the Spokane River. As Laren reached for my hand to help me up onto the concrete landing prior to crossing, I felt a little something. At that moment, I felt deep down that this was something more than just a friendship. But I wouldn't admit that to anyone, not even my journal--at the time.

I did not want to portray that I needed a guy, especially after the sour taste Frank left in my mouth. That one gesture spoke volumes to me about his nature, his gentleman-liness, (if that is even a word) and I was impressed. I did not need help to step up, it wasn't that high up and it was level. But it wasn't about if I was able to or not, it was the gesture that mattered to me.

That first date was the second week in May 1993, and we were engaged October 9th of that same year. We were married on this date, December 28th, 1993, fourteen years ago. It has been the best years of my life. Laren is the love of my life and my best friend!

And as I paused in my writing a few minutes ago, to take a call from Him who was calling to tell me he made it to his destination out of State, I realized all over again why he is such a keeper. I did not tell him to call me when he gets there, but I was worried about his safety on slippery roads and a tight schedule. He knew I would be worried and called to ease my mind. Thanks for that, Laren! That is one of the many reasons I love you!!

Happy 14th Anniversary, Honey!

(I'm limited on pictures I have on my laptop. I have many more on my main computer but at the moment that system is still down, so these pictures will have to suffice!)